Everyone
knows we don't have the full story from Roswell,
but in the myriad of theories proposed by various
students of the case, nobody has yet thought
of following the money. Who makes a profit from
the sales of souvenirs, t-shirts etc. to the
visitors who flock to this site. The answer is
obvious. Motel and restaurant owners, garages,
souvenir store proprietors. Has anyone ever questioned
these people, tested them, subjected them to
the Hayden Bright Light Alien Detector (pat.
pending)?
Nobody
to this date has suggested, as I am now doing,
that the above named individuals be put under
the same scrutiny we gave to the diversionary
(and obviously fake) Alien Autopsy. The REAL aliens
(motel owners, garage owners, do I really have
to say it again?) want you to believe that they
(the aliens) look like the Roswell pictures.
In fact, aliens look just like us except for
a tiny doorknob shaped growth concealed in the
armpit hair, and birthmarks on their asses that
resemble the crab nebula. These are sometimes
covered with cosmetics. Send for our informative
one-sheet The Souvenir Sellers of Roswell and
Their Co-Conspirators, the Motel Owners, Garage
Owners and Restaurant Owners of Roswell. Find
out who they pay taxes to. Send ten dollars cash
to:
Fakeaddress,
Box 111, Montpelier, VT.
(If
you are an alien and send for this, don't expect
anything in return. -- H.H.)
(**NOTE: Hyman
Hayden is
a member of the Paranoid Alliance for Personal
Protection (PAPP) and is licensed to carry a concealed weapon.)
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