THE FILES by
Untrue News paranoia editor Hyman Hayden**
How
did you find us?
Your Computer transmits to the aliens
If you have a computer
microphone, how do you know that even when you turn
it off, it is not being used as a transmitter to
broadcast your private conversations to aliens? Oh
yes, I can hear your laughter. You are willing to
mock a statement that seems, at face value, so unreasonable.
But you have not yet answered my question. How do
you KNOW that your microphone is not
being used as a transmitter?
The answer is, unless
you are a spy equipment professional, a military
officer stationed at Roswell, or have recently
had your room swept by a Hayden Alien Bug Detector ® you
don't know. And if you don't know whether or not
your microphone is a transmitter, I suggest you
have even less of an idea to whom it might be transmitting.
You've
been alerted.
--H.H.
(**NOTE: Hyman
Hayden is a member of the Paranoid
Alliance for Personal Protection (PAPP)
and is licensed to carry a concealed weapon.)
FILES 
If you have a computer
microphone, how do you know that even when you turn
it off, it is not being used as a transmitter to
broadcast your private conversations to aliens? Oh
yes, I can hear your laughter. You are willing to
mock a statement that seems, at face value, so unreasonable.
But you have not yet answered my question. How do
you KNOW that your microphone is not
being used as a transmitter? 
